Below is part of a visualisation series summarising Big Think’s interview with Anne-Laure Le Cunff’s: The 3 cognitive scripts that rule over your life.

Watch the interview or read the full transcript if you want to learn direct from the source.

“The problem with cognitive scripts is when we use them to make more important decisions in our lives, in our careers, in our relationships, instead of asking ourselves, "Is that really what I want to do? Is that my decision?" We let our choices being driven by those stories that we have internalized, by those scripts that tell us how we're supposed to behave in a certain situation.”
—Anne-Laure Le Cunff

Cognitive scripts are internalized mental patterns or narratives that shape how we make decisions—often subconsciously. These scripts are patterns or “stories” that guide how we act in recurring situations, from daily routines (like visiting the doctor) to major life choices (careers, relationships).

While these scripts can help us navigate the world more efficiently, when applied to big life decisions can be limiting because they substitute self-inquiry with autopilot responses conditioned through expectations.

These subconscious scripts can prevent us from exploring new possibilities or defining success on our own terms, as it can limit our ability to make conscious, intentional decisions, especially for significant life changes that optimize growth.

Three Key Cognitive Scripts that Limit Us:

1. The Sequel Script:

Repeating past behaviours simply because “that’s what we’ve always done”—staying in familiar jobs or relationships out of habit, not choice.

Narrative: “I’ve always done this, so I must continue.”

Effect: Limits exploration by sticking to past patterns.

Examples:

Choosing a job just because it matches your degree/studies.
Dating similar types of people over and over again.
Making decisions for continuity’s sake versus growth and opportunity.

2. The Crowd-Pleaser Script:

Making decisions to satisfy others’ expectations, even if it conflicts with personal desires or fulfilment.

Narrative: “I should do what makes others happy.”

Effect: You make choices to satisfy parents, partners, peers, not yourself.

Hidden Cost: Suppresses authentic desire and personal happiness.

3. The Epic Script:

Feeling pressured to pursue only grand, ambitious goals, and viewing anything less as failure; this can lead to anxiety and a constant sense of inadequacy.

Narrative: “My life must be big, impressive, and purposeful to matter.”

Effect:

Promotes unrealistic expectations and survivorship bias.
Stigmatizes simplicity, small joys, and alternative success.
Leads to an identity crisis when grand goals aren’t met.

Survivorship bias is a logical error that occurs when we focus only on people or things that made it past a certain selection process—and ignore those that didn’t—leading to a skewed view of reality.

How to Break Free: Rewriting Your Life’s Script

The word “should” is a signal that a cognitive script may be guiding your behavior.

Try: “What might I want to do?” instead of “What should I do?”

Encourages curiosity, freedom, and agency which:

Invites open-ended exploration
Supports self-directed growth
Leaves room for experimentation and surprise
Embraces uncertainty to center on what might be over what must be

Instead of conformity, rigidity, and obligation which:

Limits choices to what’s “expected” or “acceptable”
Reinforces external validation
Stifles inner desire or unconventional paths
Centers what should be over what could be

Three Reframing Questions for Self-Discovery:

Am I following my past, or discovering my path?
Am I following the crowd, or discovering my tribe?
Am I following my passion, or discovering my curiosity?

These three questions will help you to embrace experimentation.

If procrastination shows up, remember procrastination is not laziness, but information.

Cultural Conditioning will have us believe:

Productivity is equated with morality and self-worth due to centuries of industrialization, efficiency obsession, and productivity bias.
Society treats procrastination like laziness, instead of seeing it as useful feedback.

Triple Check Tool: Diagnose Your Procrastination

Ask: Is my procrastination coming from the head, heart, or hand?

Source: Head

Meaning: Rational misalignment
Suggested Action: Reassess the strategy or direction

Source: Heart

Meaning: Emotional disinterest
Suggested Action: Make it more fun or meaningful

Source: Hand

Meaning: Lack of tools/skills
Suggested Action: Ask for help, learn, or get support

Even when everything seems to align—head, heart, and hand—we may still find ourselves procrastinating.

If so, then it may not be the systems operating within us that are inhibiting; rather, it may not be us that needs fixing, but the environment, context, and influences around us that need change.

Becoming aware of the cognitive scripts that guide us is a powerful act of self-liberation.

These scripts—whether inherited, learned, or absorbed—are not absolute truths.

They are the stories we allow to play in our minds; and like all stories than can be rewritten.

Breaking free starts with labeling and then questioning. By trading “should” for “might,” from pressure for possibility, and perfection for play, we give ourselves permission to experiment with new paths—to explore life not as something to optimise, but as something to discover and enjoy!

In this space of curiosity, we don’t just make better choices—we make decisions that are more aligned with our truest selves—and that is the beginning of a life shaped not by default, but by design.

Isn’t the autonomy and liberty to choose to live the life we envision what we all want, after all?

The Problem with Limiting Cognitive Scripts